Forget talking to your kids about Santa or the Easter Bunny.  Lets talk about what really matters, the fact that being perfect is not real and the constant effort to get there is exhausting and futile.  The other night I started watching The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel and something she did made me cringe because I remember being that girl!  The effort put forth to always look perfect by getting up early and applying her makeup so she would look flawless to her man.  I remember going to bed with my makeup on in a similar effort.  In the beginning we all try to put our “best face forward”  but at what point do we take it too far?  At what point do we sacrifice being true to ourselves and our relationship for the appearance of perfection?

Trying to create an image of perfection can be seen everywhere, especially with social media.  People always posting the great vacations, new bodies from working out, those overly posed beach pictures in a bikini doing a meditative yoga pose or, the famous, overly filtered selfies.  The need to create the image of effortless perfection seems to be important to so many.  The truth is we all just want to be loved and accepted exactly the way we are but there is a catch to being to satisfied with where you are in life also.  The truth is, there is always room for improvement in some area of life and we should all strive to learn and grow daily.  However, to constantly learn and grow means taking risks and making mistakes and ultimately….accepting imperfection as reality.

I am not saying the first couple of months of dating a person you should allow them to see you at your worst just to see if they are really as in to you as they say they are…but it is probably better for them to see you at your worst and still accept you than to put out the constant effort of little miss perfect for months to just come down with the stomach flu and realize he is a superficial jerk.  I have found that most men who are worth the time do not really expect or want perfection anyway.  They want to see the silly side, hear the embarrassing stories and share in awful hangover moments when your fake eyelashes look more like windshield wipers the next morning.  Isn’t the goal to be best friends with your forever person?  So if you can’t laugh at yourself with them, then what the heck is the point of the relationship?

Take the pressure off, allow yourself to be human, vulnerable and don’t be afraid to own your mistakes and admit when things are hard.  Accept others as they are, we are all unique and beautiful in our own way.  Maybe perfection is much like beauty, it is in the eye of the beholder; it doesn’t fit one exact standard set in a magazine or on television show.  Maybe perfection does exist just like beauty and love….it can be found in all of us. So look for the love & beauty in all things this new year, and together maybe we can create something a little bit closer to perfect.

Stacy