I would say that self-talk is probably the most important conversation a person can have in their day. The phrases we repeat throughout the day can make a difference in every aspect of our lives. Even the little half-humor/half-truth jokes we say out loud, like I am the forever single crazy cat lady. If you constantly say out loud to yourself and others that you are forever only going to be in the company of your four-legged furry friends, well then, you probably will remain that way. Even if you don’t really want to be the single cat lady and you are just making a joke about your current situation, it can be causing damage…mainly it will just continue to be your situation.
Sometimes we don’t realize the constant repeat cycle that goes on in our thoughts and consistently rolls out of our mouths out of habit. This constant repeat cycle is no different than repeating a positive mantra. If you say it enough your mind and body will start to believe it. Be more self-aware of the thoughts and words you put out into the world and into your self image. Replace those negative little jabs at yourself with something more positive and goal oriented. If you truly want a guy in your life then stop making remarks about the world not having any good guys left. If you truly want to lose weight then stop making food jokes about liking fitness…like fitness whole burger in my mouth! Too often I see people use humor to hide something they feel bad about. So don’t be afraid to get really honest with yourself and call yourself out on the bullshit.
This brings me to the second rule. Sometimes we just talk too much to ourselves. We talk or think about what we want, what we don’t want, what we should do or should stop doing….we can end up talking ourselves into and out of a lot of things instead of just acting upon it. Mornings a great example for most people. How often do you plan the night before to get up the next morning and be productive by doing a workout or meditating before you start your work day? Then the next morning rolls around and you are all warm and cozy in your bed and the damn self-talk starts…I deserve a little sleep in, its only Monday and Mondays suck anyway, I have 6 more days in the week to workout, its cold and I don’t really feel good….Nope, nope and NOPE! Don’t let this even get started. It’s like your 7-year-old self has made a entrance into your adult life so when this kind of self-talk enters the picture you need to treat it just like the whiny little kid you are being and count to five and take action.
Each morning if you put the breaks on the self-talk and just hear the alarm, turn it off and immediately start moving…get out of bed, go pee(you know we all do that first), start the shower, as it warms up make your bed, then jump in that nice warm shower and wash that 7-year-old out of your head and jump out of that shower ready to tackle your day! Make a full on game plan for yourself the night before….have your workout clothes laid out by the bed your work clothes laid out in the bathroom and your breakfast and lunch prepped for the next day. When you wake-up don’t think about other options…train yourself to believe that there are no other options. Just jump out of bed and put on the work-out clothes and hit it. As soon as you complete your workout shower and get ready for work, make your healthy planned breakfast, grab your lunch and before you know it you will be on your way to the office. Creating habits is about routine and taking action each day in the same order. Those first five seconds that you wake-up is about action, not thought. You can create good or bad habits in this way.
How often do you get off work and immediately think of going for drinks and food at the local place with friends; or go home and get into comfy clothes and sit in front of the TV eating a snack even if you are not really hungry….we just do so many things out of habit. So you have to take action and create new ones. Find your triggers in the day and look for ways to change them. If you get off work and automatically drive to the local hang-out, then change the drive route to the local park for a walk or to the gym for a quick work-out. If your trigger is to go home after work and sit in front of the TV then change it to immediately grabbing the leash and taking your dog for a walk or grab a great book you have been wanting to start and go sit on the front porch. The snack trigger is sitting in front of the TV so avoid that trigger by going somewhere else in the house. I am big on creating a meditation space and when I feel the need to hit the reset button I go to my zone.
When we pay attention to our self-talk , take action and reroute our triggers for the day then we are on our way to a happier, healthier lifestyle.
With health, happiness, and positive action and self-talk,