You ever have a moment that frustrates you but you are unsure exactly why it bothers you so much? The more you think about the moment you just want validation for how you are feeling, so you think you are going to call a friend and analyze things. Have you ever considered calling that friend and then stopped? Did you ever stop and think that analyzing the situation with someone else is exactly what you don’t need to do? That is right, don’t talk about the things that frustrate you, at least not to other people. The best thing you can do is talk it out with yourself and…God.
Maybe you are not a believer in the big man upstairs, that is okay, whatever you call it …the universe, Buddha, Mother Nature…we all have something greater than us that we go to in times of struggle. Whatever you call that almighty power, I promise the conversations you have in those moments will be more enlightening than any conversation you have with that friend you were about to call. We need to trust in ourselves to resolve our own conflict through thoughtfulness, meditation and prayer. In these moments the biggest answers to worries, struggles and frustrations can become clear.
The truth is, the more you think about and discuss things, the bigger it becomes. So the best thing you can do is pray or meditate upon it and then let it go. The things you really want to be giving your energy to is the positive. Talk to your friends about the good things in your life, the things that excite you, your goals to better yourself. Never give your time and energy to the negative by over-analyzing issues. I truly believe, the more you talk about something, the bigger it gets, so lets not make our problems bigger.
I have also found that listening is the best thing you can do. So have you ever just listened to yourself? Yes, at first thought, talking to yourself sounds like the straight path to crazy but the truth is, self talk can be very therapeutic. If anyone knows the situation and feelings involved in the situation it is going to be you…so why not discuss the issue with yourself? Ask yourself why you really think you are upset? Are you assuming certain things or do you have all the facts? Be honest with yourself, are you over-reacting or is this obviously something you should confront? Ask yourself what advice would you give to a friend who came to you with the same dilemma? Then take your own advice, but be very honest with yourself.
Learning to work through your problems on your own is a sign of strength. I am not saying that you should never turn to others in times of struggle. It is good to have a support system when things are hard and you can’t self sooth. However, learning to work through social, mental and emotional issues on your own, through different methods, creates a stronger connection within. Stop yourself and take a moment to take in everything around you, the sounds in the room around you, the feeling of your body from head to toe, the smells, listen to your breathing….connect with yourself like this a few times throughout the day. Learning to stop, be self aware and very present will help you stop in frustrating moments and gain composure before simply reacting.
Take time to be alone and talk things through with yourself and/or God….just talk out loud and you might be surprised just how much insight you really already have on the situation.
With Happiness, Health, Love and Great Self Talk,